Weather it'

So I will be turning off my computer for at least a day due to the weather out here.

We are suppose to be hit by hurricane Ed so my one precaution is to shut down my computer.

No...I am not worried. At all.
Maybe I should be. Maybe I am too nonchalant about hurricanes.
I'm sure some of you out there would be freaking out, buying gallons of water, canned goods and generators...not me.

Now, if it were a category 3 hurricane, I would be more cautious. I would have gone to Wal-mart this morning and bought a few items. But, it's only a one so...yeah...

Of course, you'd think this was a huge deal by the way people are flippin'. According to a friend of mine, the water was gone at Wal-mart by 4 this afternoon. Lines were forming at gas stations and some even boarded up windows in our neighborhood. Seriously, people! Come on!

It's not the hurricane we should worry about, but the rain. That could be bad, but fortunately it has never flooded around here. And tornadoes, I hate tornadoes. But what are the chances?

But I guess it's like if you lived in "Tornado Alley," which by the way, I would move so far from anything called the "alley." Think about it. Only bad things happen in alley's. Muggings, shootings, being beaten up by cops, strangers lurking about, being sold a fake coach bag. All bad things.

Anyways, according to a reliable source ( my very good friend from college - a good ol' texan girl who lived in the alley for a while but fortunately moved back to texas) says that when a tornado hits, people don't even go underground. They continue what they are doing without a hitch. She says the sirens would go off and they continue to eat their barbecue! CRAZY!

And Earthquakes...Now that is scary. I will never live in California or Japan. No way! Apparently when "tremors" happen, which apparently happen often but don't count as earthquakes, people aren't even phased.

If the ground is moving underneath me, "OH MY GOODNESS!" I mean, the bible talks about earthquakes a lot, so I'm thinking those are serious things. I have never read anything about hurricanes. So...I'll take my chances here by the gulf.

I have my flashlight, new batteries, candles and that's about it. I hope we don't lose power because then I will have to entertain my son all day without TV. (Don't worry, we stick by that less than two hour rule...two in the morning and two in the afternoon.) Thank goodness for portable DVD players!

So...all that to say "Goodnight and see you after the storm!" I'm going to go charge that DVD player right now.

"Dear Father, protect my family. Protect my home, from property line to property line. This is your home Lord, so encamp your angels all around. Do not let any harm come to it or my family where ever they are during this storm. And for all those out there weathering the storm or maybe another kind of storm, wrap your arms around them so that peace that passeth all understanding will fill their hearts. Thank you for being so merciful and good. In your precious name, Amen."

Likable me...

I had one of those days...no more like one of those weeks.

One of my struggles, one of my many struggles, is my desire to be liked. I want people to like me. I care about what people think about me. So much so that at times I will pretend or be what I think others want me to be.

Writing this, I feel very pathetic. But...it's truth. Crazy truth.

I became very aware of this and how wrong it is this past winter. It was one of the main things God was shaking, no, burning out of my life. And though I can rejoice and say I don't struggle with this as much, nor do I find myself pretending as much, like most, I sometimes fall into this hole.

I had my feelings hurt this past week. Perhaps it was not intentional, perhaps no one noticed, perhaps I took it all wrong. Either way I was hurting. And instead of going to God and saying help me with this, I put a couple of bricks on my walls of anger and resentment and bitterness. The bricks God and I had worked so hard at breaking, I quickly rebuilt.

And of course I became vulnerable. Vulnerable to attacks, vulnerable to my own mind and imagination. I went along, but my head tormented me. Immediately thoughts of low self esteem, envy and unworthiness plagued me.

I prayed, but my prayers weren't prayers of battle, but prayers of pity. "Lord, I thought we were done. Please take this away. Why do I feel this way. Why am I thinking this way..."

I needed to battle my mind, but I had left my armor. My guard was down. I retreated.

I was invited to go to the zoo with some great friends. Friends who I know love me and who I love dearly. Friends who would never think or do anything to hurt me. Friends I trust and who know me very well.

I was all for it. A day at the Zoo. Crazy kid loves the zoo.

But then my mind entrapped me. I began to cower. And instead of telling my head to shut up, I listened and retreated.

I said I wasn't going to go after all, I didn't want to bear the heat.

Yes, that was partly true. I hate being hot and that is one of the downfalls of being pregnant. But mostly...I didn't want to pretend. I didn't want to battle my mind the whole time. I didn't want to question everything I said or did. I didn't want to wonder what others thought.

I figured it would be better to be alone and deal with my head alone. Then of course, lonliness sets in very fast.

I should have gone. We would have had a great time. Sure I kept myself busy and I told myself it would have been too hot and I had other things to do but...truth hurts.

I let my mind win. I was the coward and I retreated.

I cried out to God. I filled my mind with his words and not my own. Finally.

Why couldn't I have done that in the first place. How much more and how many more times must I learn this again?

Why do I need to have others like me so much? Am I really that needy? Is this a real need or a void or simply a vulnerable piece of me when I have such feelings? I don't know.

Do I need people to show me they care or is it just when I feel this way? I was always taught not to be needy...but maybe I am, I'm just really good at pretending I'm not. So good I convince myself. I don't know.

Maybe I need to keep working on filling that need with Christ.

"Father, you know me. You know the number of hairs on my head. You know my weakness. I know all that matters is what You think of me and how I glorify you...but I need to keep telling my head that. My greatest desire is to need nothing but You...but I struggle with that. My flesh wants to be wanted, needed, liked. Why Lord? Father purify me of this selfish desire. Continue to mold me. Continue to cleanse me until I am your reflection. Remind me that I am worth far more than rubies and that you want me, you need me for your glory and you love me. Thank you Father for bringing me to my knees and reminding me that I am nothing without you. In your precious name, Amen."

Mary Janes

When I was about 17 my grandmother taught me how to knit. To be honest, I have knitted very few things...a black mohair scarf, another purple attempt at a scarf (it didn't make it to the end) and what started as a bllanket but soon ended as a pot holder.

However, once I got pregnant with crazy kid I began to knit a bit more. I knew I didn't have the patience or skill to do a blanket, but I could make booties and so I did. His first pair of shoes where white booties with a blue ribbon stitched lovingly by me. He wore them on his way home from the hospital and he wore them at his dedication, plus some times in between.

So...that being said I am now working on a pair of booties for baby. And then I started thinking, I am going to see if I can make some cute shoes for her to wear as well, she's born in december so it's perfect bootie wearing time!

In my searching I came upon this website for super cute mary janes and to top it off, they look super easy to make. So I am adding the pattern here and website and if you would like to take a stab...Go for it. In the meantime, I will keep you posted on my progress.

Size0-6 months Foot length: Approximately 3 inches (7.5cm) Ankle:Approximately 4 inches (10cm) circumference with strap buttoned

What You'll NeedYarn: Sport weight yarn, 137 yards [125m]
Notions: Stitch holder; tapestry needle; 2 small buttons, about 1/4-1/2" (6-1.3cm); sewing needle and thread to match yarn

Gauge24 stitches and 52 rows=4" (10cm)

Making the Left Bootie

Cast on 31 stitches.
Row 1: Knit all stitches.

Row 2: Knit 1, make 1, knit 14, make 1, knit 1, make 1, knit 14, make 1, knit 1. (35 stitches)

Row 3: Knit.

Row 4: Knit 2, make 1, knit 14, make 1, knit 3, make 1, knit 14, make 1, knit 2. (39 stitches)

Row 5: Knit.

Row 6: Knit 3, make 1, knit 14, make 1, knit 5, make 1, knit 14, make 1, knit 3. (43 stitches)

Row 7: Knit.

Row 8: Knit 4, make 1, knit 14, make 1, knit 7, make 1, knit 14, make 1, knit 4. (47 stitches

)Rows 9-17: Knit all stitches.

Row 18: Knit 15, (work slip slip knit decrease) 4 times, knit 1, (knit 2 together) 4 times, knit 15. (39 stitches)

Row 19: Knit.

Row 20: Knit 9, beginning with next 2 stitches bind off 21 stitches, knit across remaining 9 stitches. (This includes 1 stitch already on right needle after the bind-off.)

Put first set of 9 stitches on holder.
Rows 21-23: Knit 9 stitches on needle.
Bind off all 9 stitches; cut yarn.
Rejoin yarn where you started binding off 21 stitches. Cast on 12 stitches using cable cast-on method.

Row 21: Knit across 12 new stitches and 9 from holder. (21 stitches total) Row 22 (buttonhole row): Knit 18, knit 2 together, yarn over, knit 1. (21 stitches on needle)Row 23: Knit.
Bind off all stitches.

Making the Right Bootie

Work same as for left bootie through row 20.

Put first set of 9 stitches on holder.
Row 21: Knit 9 stitches on needle; turn work and cast on 12 stitches at end of row using cable cast-on method.

Row 22: Knit 21 stitches (beginning with the 12 new stitches).

Row 23 (buttonhole row): Knit 18, knit 2 together, yarn over, knit 1.

Row 24: Knit all 21 stitches.
Bind off all stitches on needle. Cut yarn leaving 40 (10cm) tail to weave in later. Rejoin yarn to stitches on holder.R

ows 21-23: Knit 9 stitches on needle.
Bind off all stitches.

Finishing

Fold bootie with wrong sides together, and using the invisible seam for garter stitch, sew together back of bootie.
Bottom edges: With wrong sides together, whipstitch cast-on edges together.
Buttons: On the outside of the bootie, opposite the strap side, attach button with sewing needle and matching thread (used doubled), stitching through the holes in the button (or over a button shank) several times. Weave sewing thread through several stitches to secure. (Note: Small buttons may pose a choking hazard, so be sure to stitch securely to bootie.)

Weave in all yarn ends to wrong side of work.

Making baby booties works for me! For more stuff that works, click here.

To do in 6 months or less...

So, now that we know we are having a baby girl I have an extensive to do list which must be completed before December!

1. Paint room PINK!
2. Make bedding/curtains/diaper cloths/and other decorative projects I have in mind...
3. Get the furniture that is now in the room out of the room and in the attic or on craigs list.
4. Figure out what to do with the furniture that we are planning to keep around and pray it fits wherever it needs to fit.
5. Register.
6. Find all the baby stuff that's in various closets.
7. Read more on this BPA stuff.
8. Knit booties for her arrival.
9. Start shopping in the plentiful aisles of baby girl clothes.
10. Find the rest of the furniture that she needs.

So...those, in a nut shell are all the projects I have to do in the next few months. If you need me I'm either at hobby lobby, etsy or babies r'us!

"Father give me the power to make right decisions on all of this stuff! And the energy to get it all done and not procrastinate or over exert myself. Let it all go smoothly and beautifully as I have planned it all in my crazy head. Be all over this room and in every piece of furniture and all the love we put into it. In your precious name, Amen."

For more things to tackle, click here!

Whoa Baby!

It's official...
I am over the top over joyed!


IT'S A GIRL!!!!!


We found out the news on Friday and it was exhausting!
I was so nervous and had been in prayer all week about it. I was trying to convince myself that it was a boy and I just had to accept it, because I didn't want to be dissapointed, I love my baby, boy or girl, but I was afraid that if I built it up too much I would be dissapointed.

I was praying all week, "ok Lord, you know so I need you to prepare my heart for the news. My desire is a girl, you know that, but your will is best and you know what I need more than I do, I understand that, but I need you to tell my heart that."

I was praying this everytime I thought about it.

And in my heart I could softly hear the words, "I will give you the desires of your heart," but my head doubted. I thought, "but God, I don't want to be dissapointed. I want to be thrilled and happy about my baby."

So...there we were. My son and husband and a few other family members waiting...nervous for my sake...

It took a little bit for the baby to move into position and I promise you, while I was lying there I thought, "Ok Lord, I trust you and I know it's a boy and that's perfect."

And right then the lady says, "Well, your gonna have a girl!"

I began to cry. I was so happy.

And everything that the Lord had taken me through this past year all came to perfection. I knew in my heart it would be a girl, because God had told me. But you know how it is...your mind gets your heart all muddled and confused and doubtful. She is a piece of my reward for the storm that he led me through.

God knew I had to be better, to be wiser, to trust him and get rid of the junk in my life that would hinder me from being the mother he wants me to be. The mother she needs me to be. He knew all along.

I am thrilled beyond...I am in awe of my Lord.

Emma Gabrielle...

Emma - from Emmanuel, "God with us," and Gabrielle - "God's messenger."

"My precious Lord, you are so good to me. You truly do give me the desires of my heart and everytime I am in awe. Thank you for trusting me with this precious baby girl. I can't get over how good you are and how much you love me. You have been in every part of this pregnancy from conception and I ask you to continue to bless the health of my and my baby. Keep her safe until the perfect moment. In your sweet name, Amen."

The groove

Summer is busy. I haven't been blogging the way I use to and I don't like that, yet at the same time I don't have time to do much about it...

These next few weeks should go back to normal ( I hope) so I promise to get back on and write/read away. I have been neglecting so many of my bloggy friends as well and I feel bad...

Hopefully I will fall back into the groove again.

Good to be Home

We have been out of town the last week, just the hubby and I. We had an absolutely marvelous time, perfect, beautiful Florida sunshine, good flights, yummy food.

It was relaxing, revitalizing and refreshing. All that I needed.

Little one stayed with his grandparents and had a wonderful time away from us. He had his own sort of vacation...swimming everyday, fishing, golfing and receiving new toys. In many ways, I am sure his vacation was probably better than ours.

All in all...it's good to be home.

Though I treasured every moment with my husband and could probably stayed a few more days lying on the white sand beaches, it was nice to come home.

And mostly, I missed by son. I really did. The first few days were great, but by the end of the trip I was ready to see his precious little smile and hear his quirky sayings. In fact, I was so excited to see him on Sunday...almost giddy. And when I did, my heart just melted all over.

Since we've been home, I am reminded of how cute and funny he is and just how absolutely precious he is. Because, let me just say that he is the cutest child in the world...and I'm not the only who thinks this...his father and grandparents are in agreement. I'm sorry for the rest of you out there who may have the same feelings about your children but...Ok, so I am a bit biased but oh well!

I have learned one thing in these past few days...you can travel the world (or atleast to the east coast) and be rejuvinated and tanned, but there is nothing more refreshing or enjoyable than to hear your toddler's little voice say, "I wove you."

Now I must go and unpack our stuff!

"Father, thank you so much for a wonderful time with my husband. You were in every aspect of our vacation and it was so needed. You made it perfect and took care of every detail. Thank you for your protection and for bringing our family back together. "I wove you" Lord. In your precious name, Amen."