The Translator

I have become a translator in our family. I am now fluent in toddlerism. I can pretty much understand most of the words that come out of my kids mouth and am quite proud of myself for doing so. Thank goodness, for his father's sake, his words are pretty clear, but most of the time I wonder how he and his father get along when I am not around.

Early on Saturday, crazy kid woke up and came downstairs. Hubs was in the shower and I was still in bed since it was my "day off."

I have deemed Saturday as my day off because it is out of the everyday routine for me. My husband is home and therefore he takes on the parental duties for atleast that morning. He thinks this is unfair because he states that he therefore never gets a day off.

This is where he is wrong.

You see him getting up early and taking on the parental duties is out of his routine. In fact, he is usually gone by the time crazy wakes and on those days I put on the 500 different hats and go about my duties. So I gave him the gift of having one on one time with his precious son as I get to sleep in or go shopping or have mommy alone time.

So this particular Saturday my son come tripping down the stairs with his "Bie" in hand and his "tete" in his mouth. He enters the room and comes over to my side and quietly says, "Good mowning mama." I grunt back a reply and then he drags his "Bie" into our bathroom letting all the light come in through the doors. I cover my head with a pillow as my son yells out to his father "Good mowning daddy."

At this time I am already irritated. I am aawaken by bright florescent lights, the stream from the shower and a loud toddler.

My son comes back into the room, leaving the bathroom door still ajar. He begins to play with his cars on the floor and then he gets up and slams the door of my room. Why? I have no idea. He doesn't leave the room he just quickly stands up and says, "Oh momma, I cwose da dor, don't worry. Stay in bed momma." Then he turns around and goes back into the bathroom, not intending to close this door whatsoever and he yells to his father, "Daddy, I shut da dor."

And his father yells back, "You ate yogurt?"

My son, becuase his father does not understand him, of course gets louder thinking, "he must not hear me."

"Dadda, I shut da dowr."

"You want to watch George?"

Now I am muttering under my breath, "what the freak, he is speaking clearly why can't you understand your son..."

"No, dadda, I shut da dooooooooooooooor."

And I chime in, " HE SHUT THE DOOR."

"Oh ok, I'll put George on for you in a minute."

Lord help that big man and the little man as well!